I hope they signed a prenup.
I think Siri knows when you’re drunk.
.@scottdeveau hates it when I repost these things because it takes away his power but who cares. (PS this photo was taken in 2002.)
Please follow @hazlittmag on Instagram because I am running it and making it verrrrry stupid.
Horrible trash-person @haleycullingham put my words and my mug in Maisonneuve this month. Buy it so that you can draw things on my face.
I was about to donate some terrible self-help book that is inexplicably in my apartment but it’s a good thing I looked inside first because look at this ridiculous picture of my mom that was tucked in the jacket.
"I can’t believe @mattbraga called me fat."
THIS IS THE WORST DAY OF MY LIFE.
THIS IS ANTI-FEMALE, NETFLIX.